05 / Confidence guide
How to look confident before you walk in.
People decide how confident you are in the first few seconds, before you say a word. These five things happen at the door, and all of them can be practised.
A five-point checklist
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01
Exhale before the door
One slow breath out, longer than the breath in, drops your shoulders and slows your heart. Do it with your hand on the door handle.
TipBreathe in for four counts and out for six.
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02
Pause for one beat
Stop in the doorway for a moment instead of rushing in. The pause shows you’re comfortable, and it gives you a second to look around the room.
TipOne beat is enough. Longer starts to look like hesitation.
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03
Free your hands
Clutching your phone, bag strap or a drink closes your body off. Let your arms hang naturally, or rest one hand lightly on your bag.
TipPut your phone away before you reach the door, not after.
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04
Slow your first three steps
Rushing looks nervous. Take your first three steps on purpose, a little slower than feels natural. The rest of your walk will follow the pace you set.
TipLong, even steps look calmer than short, quick ones.
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05
Find a face
Look at someone, a friend or the host, not the floor. Meet their eyes first, then smile. A smile that comes after eye contact looks real.
TipNo one to look at? Pick a point at eye level, just like on a runway.
Rehearse it at home
- Use your own front door or any doorway.
- Run the whole checklist: exhale, pause, free your hands, three slow steps, find a face.
- Do it five times until it feels normal.
- Film one entrance and watch your first three steps.
Défilé for iPhone
Film your entrance in défilé and get your walk score.
Défilé scores your walk out of 100, shows you what’s holding it back and gives you one short drill to fix it. Your video never leaves your phone.
Keep practising
